To all the boys I've loved,

Updated: Oct 31, 2019

If every significant other I've had was a song, here's what they would be.

Song: When I see you - Fantasia

You are the first person I remember planning outfits for. You kept complimenting me when I wore blue, so I wore it a lot that year. Did you notice? You had/have such a nice smile! You're so dang sweet! I know you're doing well. Thank you for the butterflies. Not once did you make me feel less than a princess. Sorry for not telling you about moving schools, oh my gosh, truly. Thank you!

Song: Falling - Snakehips, Malika

Mr, you are my longest standing situationship. I think the world of you still today! Your girlfriend is a cutie. You don't know this, no one does, but I started playing volleyball because of you, this might explain why I stopped playing after I moved schools (another one). LOL. I see you around sometimes and I'm glad we still greet each other. You were without a doubt, I'm sure you still are, ridiculously thoughtful and kind. You made me feel really special. You didn't make me cry ever. I always made you initiate, and I was stubborn (still am), thanks for putting up with me. I wish you so much love and happiness. Take care of you know who!

Song: Like a fan - Craig David

I hate how things ended, and started, the duration of everything in between wasn't super great either. I'm sorry for what I didn't do. I don't have anything against you anymore. I think we needed each other, maybe not in the way people set out to, but hey. Everyone has theirs, you happen to be mine. I'm different in relationships now, thank you for that. I hope you have everything you need, and that you are so happy right now.

Song: Danger - Acoustic - JKAY, Shola Ama


Song: Dangerously in love - Beyonce

Without a doubt, you are my first love. You are my game changer. Everything I thought I knew about myself, my perception of love, relationships, literally everything, you changed. In a lot of ways I see you as a hero, and some kind of angel. I'm sorry I couldn't be what you needed. I care for you, always will. I wish we were on better terms, it's my fault sorry. My wish for you is the world! I hope you never cry, and that your heart never breaks.

Song: Complicated - Nivea

My goodness gracious.

I've always felt too broken, or unready in any relationship I've had in the past. This is the first time in my life I feel matched in insecurity, immaturity, uncertainty, and cluelessness. Two senseless people together might be destructive, if it is, I haven't 100% found out yet. Honestly, good luck to us. I hope our wants to be in each other's life will always be stronger than our hang-ups, personal issues/struggles, and arguments. You're pushing me in ways I didn't know I could be pushed, I hope I'm doing the same for you. We have a while before we see each other, truly, I hope we make it.

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Cover photo taken by Kathleen Cano